Archives for category: Milestones

The twins first birthday! Happy Birthday Zoey and Stella. Can’t believe it’s been one year already. Time certainly flies by, although I do feel like I’ve aged about 5 years in that time!

It’s been an amazing ride. One I certainly never expected to take, but I’m glad it happened. There have certainly been rough times for all of us and we’ve certainly all made life difficult for one another at various points, but I have no doubt that we’ll be a stronger family for it — the love between all of us is obvious, even when we’re exhausted and/or frustrated.

Melisa, you are an amazing person. You have dealt with so much the last two years and you keep coming back for more. You are a role model for sure. A talented, loving natural parent and juggler of three (sometimes four) babies, (if you count Milo!). I’m not sure how you do it ever day.You’ve got things down to a science and the house runs like clockwork, until I get home and mess things up. ;) You have certainly taught me a lot and I only hope I can keep improving as a parent, in order to catch up to you one day. I love you and look up to you in every way.

Lucy, you are an amazing kid. Most days you handle being the ‘big’ sister (at two) really well. You’re even starting to be very sweet to your sisters, telling them you love them, sharing your toys, and helping momma out. It’s been a tough road and I can only imagine what it’s like to be at a point in life where you expect all the attention, only to have to share it with two sisters. You are blossoming into a sweet, intelligent kid, though, and I love you dearly. We built up a special bond when momma was pregnant with your sisters and I’m really glad we were able to do that – it really helped me get comfortable with being a parent, being able to open up and just have fun. I’m really looking forward to watching you grow up.

Zoey, you are probably the sweetest kid in the house – which is amazing given how fussy and crabby you were during the first few months. We now know what could have contributed to that, but in the end nothing beats the smile you give me when I walk in the room or come home from work. It makes the day instantly better. Your snuggles and hugs are pretty good too. You seem genuinely happy, which is amazing after all you’ve been through. I know it’s been hard for you, not being completely mobile, in a house with two very mobile sisters… not getting the attention, not being able to join in with your sisters right away, not to mention being able to move… but, in the end I think it’s helped us bond with you more. I know my love for you grows with every smile you give, every time you snuggle in when I pick you up, and every time you try to share your pacifier with me. Always stay happy and sweet, Zo-Zo.

Stella, Stella, Stella. Why do I have a feeling you’ll be the one giving us the most trouble when you are a teenager (definitely not the temper tantrums or mischievous behavior that started at like 6 months… nah) ?! Seriously, though, you are hilarious. Always talking, always doing funny, off-beat stuff, and always getting into things. Your smile and laugh is infectious, for sure. You certainly put a smile on our faces! You are incredibly active and always keep us (and your sisters) on our toes. Lucy has become very good at “No, Stella! No!” any time you even look at her.  You adore her regardless. It’s very obvious you love your sisters. Always talking to them and smiling. You are going to be a great sister and friend to them. For me, since you’re the youngest (by 12 minutes) and smallest, you’ve always had a special place in my heart… I’m just not looking forward to the day you are slamming your door and calling me the “murderer of love!” :) Always stay who you are, Stella.

As you can see, we have quite the spectrum of personalities in our household. It’s made our journey to this point even more interesting and I know it will only continue to get better in the years to come. I am really looking forward to seeing you all grow up, forge even better relationships with all of you, and grow as a family. I love you all very much!

Jason/Dad  - 7.18.2009

Wowsers, where has the last year gone.  Zoey and Stella will be 1 in a little less than a month.  I know I’d feel like this but I am really glad I am here now, eventhough I really wish I could go back and “see” what life was like over the last 11 months.   Its a total blur.  I remembered a lot with Lucy and now, next to nothing of the twins’ first year.  Sad, but I guess necessary.  The fact that I have literally 1 or 2 memories I can call up myself from the twins’ 1st 6 months tells you something about what my brain and body was doing that my brain literally didn’t build any memories.  Or maybe I blocked them out!?  Post traumatic stress anyone??  HA!

On a side note, the few memories I have are from the first few weeks:  Sitting alone with the babies in a silent dark NICU room.  My Dad sitting on the couch with me on his computer giving JD and myself (and everyone else we know) personality tests while the kids slept when he stayed with us (sorry Mom, no memories of you with us, except one with you standing in the doorway of our house strangely).  Jump to Halloween- bringing Lucy around the neighborhood and having a good time, but wierdly I don’t have any memory of where the twins were (in the stroller?).  Next memory is Thanksgiving dinner at my parents’ house in Ballston Lake with Brian and Lacy.  Anyway, you get the picture.  I have to really sit here and work at it to recall any memories.  Pictures help, but even then, its like I don’t recognize myself.

But why should I?  I am a completely different person to the core after this year.  More on that later I suppose or maybe not.  It will take some serious time and reflection to figure out what the hell happened to me this year.  One thing is for sure: I like who I’ve grown into this year a million times better than who I was before, and for that, I will be thankful my entire life.  I am more humble, don’t take things as granted and am less judgmental.

So, an update!  We are almost there girlies!  This first birthday thing will truly feel like a celebration for the mom and dad, as they say!

People always ask, How are the girls?  And my reply is, Oh, their good.   Generic, boring and well, they are good anyway.  Here is more of a little peak at all of them lately.

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zoey

Melisa and I took Zoey to the neurologist yesterday for a formal evaluation. We received word from our pediatrician late last week that Zoey was in no immediate danger nor had any serious issues, so we were planning on a quick meeting and exam. Things didn’t quite work out like we planned, but they weren’t necessarily bad either. The basic idea we took from yesterday is we’re not out of the woods yet, so Zoey will require more evaluation and monitoring.

The doctor is concerned about three things:

1) Benign excess craniocerebral fluid. Basically there is an elevated (but still within normal levels) amount of fluid between her brain and skull. She said this is fairly common and should correct itself by the time Zoey is 2 years old.

2) Craniosynostosis. Occurs in one in 2,000 live births. This is when the skull bones fuse together too quickly and can cause problems with skull and brain growth. Zoey’s CT scan did not show evidence of this, but due to her physical characteristics (larger head, forehead shape, and ridge at suture line on left side of head), the doctor would like to monitor Zoey.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Craniosynostosis

3) Hydrocephalus. (aka “water on the brain”) Occurs in one in 500 live births. Once again, physical characteristics (larger head, sometimes tense fontanel, ridge on left suture, prominent scalp veins) lead us to caution, but symptoms such as weak appetite, seizures, and sleepiness are not present at all. The neurologist wants to monitor this as well.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hydrocephalus

So, with that said, we’re heading back to Children’s in one month for another CT scan and evaluation. This time we’ll get to meet with the neurologist right after the CT scan, so no waiting a week to hear the results.

My gut says Zoey is OK – she’s hitting milestones and seems pretty normal otherwise, but I am also glad we’re following through to make sure she is OK and continues to develop normally. It seems like diagnosing and taking care of these problems before the end of the first year is important, so if she does need help we’re definitely doing the right thing at the right time.

We appreciate all the support and well wishes we’ve received over the last couple weeks! We’ll keep everyone posted as we receive updates.

We go in for a CT scan of Zoey’s head tomorrow.  I am really not worried, but we are going in because I noticed on the right side of her head there is a wider gap between her cranial bones than on the left side.  I mentioned it to the Dr. and she seemed to think it was fine at first considering it takes up to 24 months for the bones to suture together, but on second thought she figured we should get it checked out as a precaution, just to make sure things are indeed fine.  So, I am going with the “not worried until I have something to worry about” attitude… or at least trying to.  The Dr. said that she thought the worst case scenario would be that she’d have to wear a helmet to help her bones seal together.  Which, is kinda cute I have to admit, in a funny mommy sort of way.  Anyway, she is hitting all the typical baby milestones and some of them, even ahead of time, so I don’t think there is anything huge to worry about.  Again, at least that is what I am going with for now.  Unfortunately, we have to wait a week, until next Monday, to have the Pediatric Neurosurgeon read the thing… ugh.  That seems like a long time to wait.

In other news, both babies are eating cereal and started “yellow/orange” vegetables.  Seeing that they eat enough for a small village (especially Zoey) we are going to work on making our own baby food (I may be out of my mind, but I am always saying to myself, “I had twins- how hard could this be?”).  This makes sense for a lot of reasons: 1) its darn expensive with two (hence the nursing), 2) I was never completely sure what was in those neat little factory packed containers of baby food anyway 3)baby food is notoriously wasteful in its packaging.  After all, its just water and blended veggies or fruit.  Again, how hard could it be?  On the other hand, I am a bit anxious about keeping all their food likes and dislikes and particulars straight.  But, at each step forward I am always a little nervous and nothing feels like a big deal after a first try.  I am sure it’ll be fine.

I already can’t imagine not doing things in doubles (or triples with Lucy) as is the case around here.  Three bottles, sets of clothes, snowsuits, hats, car seats, checking of seat belt straps, picking up blankets, giving kisses, making cereal, finding pacifiers long gone under the table, etc.  Dress up to go out, undress when we get there, dress up to go back in the car and undress when we get back inside x 3.  Then Lucy snack, feed both babies, change all 3 diapers, put 3 down for naps (or attempt to), breathe, get them all up from naps, change diapers, feed and finally, smile and laugh with them.  Whew.  Never felt more alive in my life.  And tired.  :)

Wish us luck tomorrow as we watch our “middle” baby girl from a window as she gets strapped down to a table and moved through a tube.  I don’t know if I am more worried for her or the technicians that have to hear her deafening, ear piercing, totally pissed off cries.  That’s my girl.

Zoey and Stella are both 1 month old today.  Its so crazy.  They’ve been home for 2 1/2 weeks now and are noticeably bigger, chubbier and becoming more alert.  Zoey is hovering around 6 lbs. and gained almost a pound in a week!  Stella is gaining a little slower and is about 5.5 lbs.  They are also sleeping together nicely and have started to look at each other which is so cool.  Sometimes they even try to nurse on each others hands or foreheads!   We have had 5 nights in a row now where they have fed 2 times at night and gone pretty much right back to sleep.  I think we might have a system that works down!  I am hoping to post some new pictures of them on flickr soon.

Not only is it easy to tell them apart, their personalities are also emerging different.  Stella definitely likes to be held more and likes to look around a lot.  She is also generally more patient when waiting to be fed, but is not as good at eating.  Zoey really only demands your attention when she’s hungry, but she loves her pacifier big time.  Zoey sleeps soundly and Stella does a lot of moving and noise-making while sleeping.  So far, they are very different, which is what I expected.  Its so inevitable, but so hard not to compare them.  This will be life for them right?  We are trying so hard to get to know them individually and not do the “dress them alike” constantly routine.  Its incredible to think of how life would be different for them if they were simply born at different times instead of how it happened, by luck, to be created at the same time, albeit from different DNA. (more…)

The twins have arrived!

Zoey resting in the NICU

Zoey resting in the NICU

Stella exhausted after a long day

Stella exhausted after a long day

Zoey Isabelle Dettbarn arrived at 3:23pm today, weighing 4lbs 13oz. Stella Elizabeth Dettbarn arrived 3:35pm, weighing 4lbs 11oz. Amazingly exciting, happy and terrifying all at once. I’ll fill in more detail later, since it is kind of late and I am beat… but it was a long day. If you are interested in the story in 140 character increments, check out my Twitter page for the updates!

More coming soon. The real adventure begins now!

Thanks for all the well wishes and notes. We really appreciate the thoughts and support from all of our friends and family. It really means a lot to both of us!

(And Melisa is resting and doing well. I’m sure she’ll sleep good tonight!)

Hey, how’s Lucy doing?  Lots of people have been asking so I thought I would update you on her latest accomplishments (which as her parents of course simply amaze us!)

  • Sniffing the toes on pictures of baby feet in books just like Daddy does after her bath!  She is also building talent in the area of lifting her toes to your nose so you can sniff them.  I don’t know how many other kids have this, but our kid’s toes actually smell bad!
  • Eating all kinds of foods now that are not related to the general “noodle” category with her newly mastered pincher grasp.  Yay- no baby food!
  • We knew she already had many dance moves up her sleeves usually arranged in random 2 second stints and repeated, but now she has added a spin around.  She loves spinning around in a circle while adding various dance moves!
  • Putting feet on the table while eating and trying to grab food with her toes.  That one is hard to keep a straight face for when saying no.
  • Screaming in delight when Daddy opens the cabinet to get snacks for her causing Daddy to break things because of being startled.
  • Dramatically banging her body against baby gates that block her from going outside when the doors are open.  That kid just can’t get enough fresh air.
  • Learning to run in random directions and generally delighting in her own independence (which is so wonderful to watch).  She is also remembering things she sees one time and doing them again- which is amazing.  Sponge!

I could go on and on…..what a ham!

How great is this! One of our faves from the North, Feist does Sesame Street!

Very exciting- our little picky eater ate a whole bunch of spaghetti elbows tonight!  Whoo hoo!  Progress!  Maybe she’ll give up her goldfish addiction a little and start to eat other kinds of “real” food.  Imagine.. veggies!

In other news, today was the 2nd non stress test and bio physical profile on the twins at the hospital.  Things look fine and the baby on my right side, who will most likely be born first- “Baby A”, is 3lbs. and 11 oz. and the baby on my left, “baby B”, is 3 lbs., 13 oz.  They are pushing 4 lbs.!  That’s over 7 lbs. of baby.  They are already bigger together than Lucy was at 5 lbs. and 8 oz.  31 weeks- 32 here I come!  Also, the Dr. said after 34 weeks, if I go into labor, they won’t stop me, but they won’t probably let me go past 38 weeks or around Aug. 9th.

If you are close to us and have spent time with Lucy, you know that she is a constant talker (she is my child after all!).  The Dr. calls her a little ahead in language (now if she could just change her own diaper!).  She started with Da-da, then Ma-ma, then cat (loves the cat), now up, dog, ball, that (constantly asking “whats that?” and pointing) and the list is growing.  She is also becoming more and more expressive, like screeching when she’s excited or to announce her presence when one of us don’t notice her behind us, inflecting her voice when she points like she is asking a question and can follow some simple commands.  She also laughs at stuff we do and she does.  Its so fun and her personality is starting to come out a lot more day by day.  She seems to have a lot to say about everything and when she is not talking she is usually crawling, climbing, taking things apart, opening things and generally being super busy all the time (often while talking at the same time!).  Even when I come in to get her in the morning in the crib, she is walking around and around her crib waving around her bear blanket.  The kid never stops!

So, I was doing some research on the interweb about language development and its interesting how young people develop their language (especially as a teacher).  By 12 months, most kids use about 1-5 words and by 18 months, this grows to about 7-20.  They also start using inflection by about 18 months too and will show emotion with body language.  Lucy now lays on the floor face down when she is tired- a little subtle huh?  They will also start using consonant sounds and lead to a spurt in vocabulary around 18 months.  By 19 months, they can understand up to 200 words and will pick up 10+ words a day!  Some can add a new word every 90 minutes!  Yikes!  They also start to combine words in sentences by the end of the second year and will express needs, wants, likes/dislikes and emotion.  Wow, that’s fast and simply amazing.  Its incredible to imagine how things will change when she can tell us what she wants and not.  Now its just trial and error!

Any stories about early language that you’d like to share?