Archives for category: Family Stories

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Us parents along with Lucy have been looking at a few preschools in anticipation for next year when she is 3. Today we visited 2 more and it was very exciting. She is definitely very thrilled to be going to “her school” next year and doing some things that only she gets to do. She loves to learn, go places and be with others so I think it will be an easy transition for her and us. However, the decision of where to go is like a part time job.

How appropriate is this title, given we are trying to find a preschool that really stands out from the rest and matches our ideas about how we want our kids educated? It feels like a big big deal. Given my background in education and experience teaching myself, my expectations are really high and I feel I know what I am looking for (which I don’t find often in schools, unfortunately). Jason brings an interesting fresh perspective from outside the education realm with his constant interest in education and politics. The other things we are up against are that all 3 will be in preschool at the same time for one year. We are looking for a school that can handle that and one that might not kill our budget as well. We also need a school that is sensitive to the twin relationship and the fact that all our kids are really close in age.

While we go through this process I have tried to put together a short list of 3 things I definitely want our kids to get out of preschool. I think this is a good start when I have very little idea about preschooling to begin with. I think Jason would probably echo these, but go ahead and add JD!! Here’s my list:

1. I want my kids to LOVE learning and be intellectually curious even more when they leave the program for Kindergarten than when they started.
2. I want my kids to see learning and life as one in the same and as a community endeavor in which they have something important to contribute.
3. I want them to be responsible, respectful, understanding, open and helpful to other people and the environment.

Short list, huh? Can we find a place like that? Stay tuned…


We visited the Erie County botanical gardens on Sunday. Kids had a great time and it was great to walk around in warmer temps with no jacket on!

Lucy and I went out for a walk tonight after dinner. Here’s a portion of our conversation:

Lucy: Look, dadda, the moon!

Me: Oh, yeah, that is the moon. Very cool!

Lucy: Dadda, bring it down here.

Me: I wish I could!

Lucy: No, dadda, jump up and get it.

Me: I wish I could do that too! It’s really, really, really far away.

Lucy: No, dadda, jump up high and bring it down here.

Conversations like that are what’s amazing about kids – they don’t have any idea of what’s not possible. Whereas our (us “grown ups”) first instinct, a lot of the time, is that’s not possible or I can’t do that. Something changes us and our outlook. I’m thinking school [with varying degrees of crushing negativism, depending on race/class/gender] or maybe it’s just us “grown ups” projecting our own ingrained negative thinking upon kids. What ever it is, I think it’s pretty sad.  Imagine how much more we could accomplish if we first thought in terms of ‘how can I do that’, rather than ‘why I can’t do that’.

Just something to think about when you have an idea, goal, or challenge in front of you… it might not be bringing the moon down to your kid, but it still can be something as ’simple’ as that project you  always talked yourself out of starting.

Last night in the bath tub…

{Lucy in bath, on her hands and knees, lifting butt in the air}

Melisa: Hey Lu, do you have to go poopy?
Lucy: Yes.
Melisa: Are you pooping right now?
Lucy: Oh, yeah.

{Melisa quickly exits bathroom and says “Good luck!”}

For the record, no poop. This time.

My brother, Brian and his fiance (now wife), Lacy’s wedding in Texas (captured by my Dad).  They are getting married on Monday in the Riviera Maya in Mexico, but due to a lot of red tape & $$ to get it legalized in the US, they opted to do a small civil ceremony in TX, where Lacy is from, a few weekends ago when they had a bridal shower to attend there.  So, so sad I didn’t get to be there.  But now, they are actually married!  Woot woot!

We are flying out Friday morning and will be there for the real deal when they tie the knot.  Can’t wait!  We will be back late Tuesday and while I will miss the kids terribly, we are looking forward to some time for just JD and I after a looooooong year!  The kids will be with our family, who I am sure, will spoil them to death and love them up every second.  We couldn’t be more lucky.  Thank you again to Mom & Dad D, Aunt Chris and Uncle Bill and Kari for taking on this HUGE favor!  Its really because of you guys that I get to go to Brian’s wedding at all!  Love you guys!  :)

Wowsers, where has the last year gone.  Zoey and Stella will be 1 in a little less than a month.  I know I’d feel like this but I am really glad I am here now, eventhough I really wish I could go back and “see” what life was like over the last 11 months.   Its a total blur.  I remembered a lot with Lucy and now, next to nothing of the twins’ first year.  Sad, but I guess necessary.  The fact that I have literally 1 or 2 memories I can call up myself from the twins’ 1st 6 months tells you something about what my brain and body was doing that my brain literally didn’t build any memories.  Or maybe I blocked them out!?  Post traumatic stress anyone??  HA!

On a side note, the few memories I have are from the first few weeks:  Sitting alone with the babies in a silent dark NICU room.  My Dad sitting on the couch with me on his computer giving JD and myself (and everyone else we know) personality tests while the kids slept when he stayed with us (sorry Mom, no memories of you with us, except one with you standing in the doorway of our house strangely).  Jump to Halloween- bringing Lucy around the neighborhood and having a good time, but wierdly I don’t have any memory of where the twins were (in the stroller?).  Next memory is Thanksgiving dinner at my parents’ house in Ballston Lake with Brian and Lacy.  Anyway, you get the picture.  I have to really sit here and work at it to recall any memories.  Pictures help, but even then, its like I don’t recognize myself.

But why should I?  I am a completely different person to the core after this year.  More on that later I suppose or maybe not.  It will take some serious time and reflection to figure out what the hell happened to me this year.  One thing is for sure: I like who I’ve grown into this year a million times better than who I was before, and for that, I will be thankful my entire life.  I am more humble, don’t take things as granted and am less judgmental.

So, an update!  We are almost there girlies!  This first birthday thing will truly feel like a celebration for the mom and dad, as they say!

People always ask, How are the girls?  And my reply is, Oh, their good.   Generic, boring and well, they are good anyway.  Here is more of a little peak at all of them lately.

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With Lucy we bought all of her mushy pureed baby food in neat packages and she gobbled them down.  Very convienient but a new day is dawning in our house with the twins now eating baby food and not just milk.  This time around I am making all the baby veggie/fruit foods and it has given me a lot of time to think about food, where it comes from, where it goes and what’s in it (I feel like I think about food all the time with the 1000 extra calories I have to take in daily to nurse the twins- not at all as easy as I would have expected extra eating to be due to all the kids around here!).  Anyway, its been far much less expensive, not too much extra work at all, much less wasteful and tastes incredible.  I cannot believe we never did this with Lucy.  The proof is in the way these two vacuum it down at dinner time.  If you’re free I could use an extra hand at feeding time, but Zoey might eat it off!  It sure is a sight feeding two this stuff at once.

I am so glad I am making all these baby foods now, but the hidden bonus is all the time I am cooking away I think about how easy it is for us to get food, for example (at least in our very priveledged country and with my fortunate circumstances).  I mean, walk into Wegmans, pick up an apple and put it into a bag.  Half the time I couldn’t even tell you exactly what I paid for that apple, never mind the travels its been on.  Making sweet potatoes  yesterday got me thinking of where they came from and what kinds of resources had to be used to grow, process and get them to that neat pile in Wegmans.  Does the $3 I paid for them really reflect the impact on the soil, cleaning and processing methods and transportation costs and impacts?  I really don’t think we appreciate our food like we would if we farmed it ourselves or could at least see the journey from seed to what we buy on a display in a store.  Things are so disconnected now and there are so many decisions regarding our foods we don’t have control over because of this process now.   It seems kind of scary/overwhelming to think of these things with something as intimate as what you put into your kids’ bodies.  What about where those veggie scraps go?  Lord knows they don’t break down in landfills, where they probably end up.  Being biodegradable means nothing if air never reaches those lonely sweet potato peels.  Nevermind a compost pile when you live in a town with a rat problem.  Geez, what a snowball of worries.  The funny thing is that while this is on my mind, it seems to be other’s too.  I wish I and others thought about it more.

Well, there are costs to living here, on this Earth for sure and I have no answers.  I think though that if we think about what’s on our plate a little more than what kind of dressing will go with the salad sitting there it might bring to light the true cost of our food.  We are trying to make a conscious effort to eat more healthy, fresh and local foods and also organics.  I am thankful that making baby food has become more than just cooking, blending and freezing for me.  At least I can be prepared to talk to my kids about choices they have control over when they are gulping it down.